Romeo Cries
at 2009-06-30
I'm tired of you putting down and shoving me aside
you did everything but trust, consent, and confide
MY FAVORATE PART HOW U PUT THOSE 3 WORDS TOGETHER AND IT FLOWED SO SMOOTHLY YOUR VERY TALENTED. THIS POEM IS FANTASTIC
Ray Smallshaw ( F P C D )
at 2009-06-30
I really get a kick every time I read another poets work for the first time and I score what I am reading excellent 5/5 and believe me on this site there are many. I found this poem has everything it flows freely with great meter. It's theme though not unfamiliar is expressive, well thought out and put together with excellence in my opinion. I love lines like
yes you gave your worldly items and proved generosity
but I refused to be a part of your material monstrosity
and
your life is a sad merry go round easily predictable
you'll find in the end you're nothing but inhospitable
with the last line closing the poem excellently
I am going to put it forward for this weeks competition. Ray S
[ Praised by : Independence Forever ]
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